The sugar frosted look the snow gave everything last week. So pretty.

The jewelry I wore during the Oscars, just for fun. It's a 1920s vintage
rhinestone earring and necklace set. Jennifer wore the bracelet and we felt
glam.

Random picture of me.

My grandma's adopted chihuahua/something else mix. She's so small, they call
her Itty Bitty. My mom rescued her from the side of the road; nobody claimed
her; and now she's thriving. This picture make

Something to make you laugh on a day that unfortunately is not Friday. Walmart
sure is rolling back those prices. Ha.

Friday got better after I posted my rant. It started snowing like crazy, so I got to leave work at 2:30pm. I got my car back ($120 to close the sunroof and fix a tire, but wtf ever). I spent the rest of the weekend doing 3 weeks worth of homework, then took my quiz for Women of Color, and I think I did really well.

Yesterday I left my phone in the car and I think I melted the battery, because there is no response whatsoever. Yay. Then I got all sick in that special "severe stomach cramps but no diarrhea" kind of way, and this morning I threw up, but I'm at work and hanging in there anyway.

It's spring break for me this week, so I'll be concentrating on reading the first 200 or so pages of James Joyce's Ulysses and not worrying about any other homework whatsoever.

Ugh. I'm trying to see the good things, but that just ends up in a discussion of the fun new bad things that keep happening. Also, I read an article in the current issue of Bitch Magazine about how all of these stupid self-help books on how to make yourself cheerful and happy are just a bunch of crap. I really want to read it, and if I remember, I'll let you guys know the title.

Reasons I bawled at work yesterday:

• I've had a raging yeast infection for a week, caused by the heavy antibiotics I've been on for 2 months.
• I
  have some sort of gross infection or allergic reaction on my mouth (like a cold sore, but
  with pus OMG GROSS) (and no, I don't have an STD or anything nasty like
  that - my body just hates me)
• I still wake up every day feeling like shit even though I'm supposedly fine, per my doctor
• School is overwhelming and I'm 2 weeks behind in all my reading
• I have a quiz due Sunday that I haven't done ANY reading for, and the quizzes for that class are really, really hard
• Things
  at work are incredibly frustrating, infuriating, etc. I do 3 times the
  work I did 5 years ago, and get paid LESS because of furlough days,
  budget cuts, bailing out our retirement company, etc.
• I'm scared I won't be able to finish my degree because EVERY.FUCKING.CLASS that I need to finish my Lit degree is during the day, and I can't leave work to do that. I also can't quit my job to finish school, because I'm damn lucky I even *have* a job right now considering the economy. I'm trapped in this cycle of work+school exhausting bullshit, and I'm over it. Except I won't give up on getting my degree. So wtf do I do? Change schools? Where? UGH!!!
• I'm tired all day, every single day
• I have to force myself to socialize so I can keep my friends, but I really just dread it
• I can't get my weight under control
• My car is breaking down in several ways and it's probably going to cost a fortune
• We had a death in the family, and while I wasn't close to this person, it's still a sad thing. She was old and unable to take care of herself and even unable to swallow, so she went into a coma, and even without food or water for 5 days, she just keep hanging on while her family was around watching her die. It's just upsetting, especially for my mom who was taking care of her.
• Since Christmas, I've spent over $2,000 on co-pays and missed work time because of being sick

I could go on, but what's the point? It's just too much to deal with at once. At least if I felt good, it would be easier. My mom drove down from Ft. Collins yesterday just to bring me some medicine for the yeast infection, and I asked her to drive me around the block for awhile. I spent that whole time sobbing like a baby, and then had to go back in to work afterward. Yesterday just completely sucked.

Today nothing has changed, except I have that post-meltdown numbness going on. Also, it's snowing, even though it was 70 degrees yesterday. And my weekend will be filled with nothing but homework catch-up, including a mind-blowing amount of reading and a hard-as-fuck quiz for my Women of Color class. So basically: fuck-all except work, work, and more work.

Daylight Savings Time is kicking my ass. So is my car. Yesterday, just before the pouring of freezing rain, the sunroof in my car decided it was going to stop working...while it was still open. I begged for a spot in the apartment garage, and got one, but damn. I've had to drive all over today for work meetings, and then I have class tonight (the same deal for the next 3 days, too), so I'm worried that someone will steal my car or that the weather will destroy it. Also, on the way to my meeting today, I got a flat tire. You know, because the whole sunroof thing wasn't quite bad enough for "shitty Monday" status.

Wow. There's nothing *quite* like waking up with a yeast infection to make you feel beautiful in the morning. Ugh. I don't understand why antibiotics (this is the end of my 3rd week, and 3rd round in the last 2 months) can CAUSE infections, when you use them to FIGHT infections. Damn stupid vagina.

Those were my allergy doctor's exact words, and he actually wrote that on my chart, like it's some medical THING to be AWARE of. As if I needed to be told that. Anyway, the allergy test went well. They only had to do 12 little shots instead of the bazillion shots I was expecting. I'm allergic to the same stuff as usual: dogs, cats, molds, etc. At least I know I haven't developed some nasty little aversion to anything new. Did you know that they tested me for a COCKROACH allergy? It's apparently this common thing, but wtf? Cockroaches? I can't imagine how they would affect people, but I guess those fuckers know how to live forever, including disarming their enemies.

The CT scan went much more easily than I thought too. It was over in maybe 5 minutes. I did have to lay on my stomach with my arms to my side and my head lifted up in a weird position (think dolphin), but luckily it wasn't for very long. I should get the results by Monday at the latest.

There have been 3 violent attacks at school in less than a week now, one of them involving two people being stabbed. I feel oh so safe walking around campus at night now. I'm going to start carrying my pepper spray in my hand between my car and my class. I don't really think I'm an easy target because of my size (it's not like, if some violent criminal had a choice between me and teeny tiny Tila Tequila, he'd pick me), but I still hate not feeling safe.

Most of my friends are feeling sad, depressed, unhappy, restless, or dissatisfied with their lives right now. It sucks because 1) I wish I could help, and 2) my life by extension becomes less fun when the people I love aren't happy. Yes, I realize that's 50% selfish, but it's also 100% true.

I'm incredibly behind in school. This is due to equal parts being too sick to study, being too depressed to study, and being too lazy to study. I have a midterm paper due Sunday that I haven't written a word on, and I'm pretty sure it's impossible to catch up on my reading unless I want to forego sleeping indefinitely. I have my Myth class tonight, and I'm so tired I would probably give someone $1,000 cash to go to school in my place and then transfer all the knowledge back to me at the end of the night. Any takers?

I saw Shutter Island with my dad, and it messed with my head. Scorcese played on some of people's worst fears, including Nazi tactics being used here at home, children being murdered, dangerously crazy people, the thought that your whole world is nothing but a fabrication, betrayal, etc. They should call it Shudder Island.

Yesterday I had some sort of allergic reaction on my lips, and they got all Angelina Jolie-puffy, plus burny and itchy. NO, I don't have some sort of herpes or something (ew); it's just allergies. Even today my lips are all messed up, and I'm itchy all over my body. This would be easier to handle if I could take some Benadryl or something, but I'm not allowed ANY allergy medication until after my allergy test on Wednesday. Agony!!!

Last night Jennifer came over to watch The Oscars. I made a beautiful tray of a bunch of fancy cheeses, grapes, crackers, veggies, etc., and we noshed on that while drinking Beaujolais, wearing my glam1920s/30s vintage rhinestone jewelry, and guessing who would win. It was actually really nice. I'm pissed that Sandra Bullock won best actress, and that The Hurt Locker won best film, but the rest of the show went pretty well I think.

This morning I found out that my second cousin tried to commit suicide on Friday by letting a train hit her. She survived but has 3 fractures in her vertebrae, a fractured pelvis, and a fractured humerus. She has been crazy from being addicted to painkillers and all kinds of crap for years, plus her dad committed suicide when she was younger (because of painful cancer), so her behavior isn't all that surprising. I really just feel bad for her mother and for her 13-year-old son. She left a note saying to look up at the stars and that she would be there. Needless to say, their whole family is really shook up, and we're feeling the aftershocks here in my family. It's really sad and upsetting and I think people are on the cusp of feeling some real anger about it too.

Today is my CT scan. When I get the results back, I should know whether or not I'll need surgery on my nose/sinuses.

Back to work.

P.S. Nick, I love you and am thinking about you.

Alice was good. I dreamt that I was Paris Hilton's half sister. And oh yeah, its 6am on a Saturday and I'm AWAKE. Wtf?!

Later I have a coffee meeting with a woman from the Latina Initiative for my Women of Color midterm project, then I'm going to FoCo for a dinner and movie Dad date, then I'm spending the night there and having brunch on Sunday for my mom's birthday, and then coming home to watch the Oscars with Jennifer and Nick.

Phew! Maybe I'll go back to bed for a couple of hours...

There are a bunch of protesters across the street. This isn't unusual, since I work directly across the street from the State Capitol, but today they're super annoying. Yesterday it was students marching for higher ed funding (and I would have been there myself if I hadn't missed so much work already from being sick), but today it's marijuana. I can't actually tell if the signs are pro or con (I think pro). The thing is, they are a small group and they're really loud (multiple megaphones, even), but I still can't read their signs or hear what they're shouting. "Hey hey ho ho, marijuana's got to go?" Or maybe it's "Hey hey ho ho, marijuana, let it grow?" It's pretty sad when potheads try to organize. (Ok, there are some people who are actually doing a good job of getting things legalized here, but in general, people who smoke weed aren't the clearest communicators.)

I just realized I overuse parentheses. Out of the above 9 sentences, 4 of them contained parentheses. Not that this is really a problem...oh god, fighting the urge to use them now... but it does seem a bit much, doesn't it?

Tonight I'm going to take a taxi home (no smelly, overcrowded bus for me!), do absolutely no homework, housework (uh...those are remarkably similar words, especially given that they mean completely different things), or work of any kind, turn my phone off, make something delicious for dinner, and watch Season 5 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I seriously can't wait. No, seriously. I'm leaving work 10 minutes early...also known as right now. Wish me a couch-potatoey, stress-free evening, hm?

UPDATE
I'll call it a wash. I didn't get out of work early and my taxi driver literally laughed maniacally while listening to conservative extremist talk radio, but my asparagus, garlic and feta mini pizza was delish, and I'm getting to bed early tonight.

Turned in my midterm, which I was writing up until one minute before I had to leave for class. Nothin' like being prepared!

I felt rushed and stressed all day today, and now I'm simultaneously tired and wound up. Also, it's over an hour past my bedtime. Ooh, I'm bad.

Seeing Alice in Wonderland on Friday which I'm looking forward to.

Time to read my Bible (yes I'm making good on that resolution; I'm on the book of Joshua right now and still maintain that God is an asshole) and go to bed.